it's the people i dont want to talk to that's talking to me.
and the people i really want to talk to that's not talking to me.

i guess even friends you'd thought you'd grow old with drift apart. and i believe it takes effort on both sides, because if one party's not wanting to talk, then maybe it's a little wasted that the other one's trying so hard. it sucks to know we're not talking anymore because of reasons..... i dont even know why.

on a side note, i think having a common topic to talk about is really important. because when u don't, the conversation jsut dies off halfway. however a few days ago i had a really really nice chat with my ex red cross friend who's doing silat now and taking part in IVP too (: it was somehow really comforting feeling knowing someone i know going through the same thing, but i think it's his 3rd year doing it, so it's not really the same. but still... somehow even after one year, silat still seems like something really foreign and new to me. just feels heartwarming to know i'll be seeing my old friend on saturday (:

and now i feel like i've come to a point i dont even know who i want to talk to anymore. someone who's willing to talk to me but i don't feel so comfortable talking to the person or someone who isn't really interested in my life right now but had been my listening ear in the past.
but in all honestly, i think it's only fair i talk to the former.

but still, there's nothing like old friends.
thank you those who'd been sticking for me right till the end.
you know who you are :)))))))

cgh tomorrow. oh man, i have a feeling this few weeks are gonna be rough. i'll get through it. somehow :)